I am feeling some terrible pain right now.
I miss wren. I feel so alone without her. Her humor, her cussing, her attention, her nerdiness. Her love.
I miss reading her writing. I miss writing with her. I miss morph. He's with me but...it's not the same. He's in agony. I can feel it. I have trouble not thinking about it.
The suicidal thoughts are weak now. Sobriety makes the pain a lot clearer. It's strange to me to deliberately choose to feel the feels. These feels are strangers to me. Interesting bedfellows I guess?